Cabin Crew, Crosscheck And Arm Doors

I realised yesterday, after receiving my edits/suggestions from Penguin, that I have a system/process/methodology when it come to my work. I had a hunch it was so but now it is proven, as it happens every time I receive feedback.

Here’s how it goes:

  1. Panic
  2. Want to give up
  3. Feel overwhelmed and want to sleep
  4. Sleep
  5. Read email about twelve times
  6. Marinate the suggestions while doing something else (last night was Zumba. I know, I know but I love it)
  7. Start to see threads of possibility in the ideas
  8. Discuss with other half endlessly until he wants to stab himself in the eardrums
  9. Become hopeful mixed with a dash of imposter syndrome
  10. Stave off actual work until the ideas are brimming over
  11. Throw myself around because I have ‘work’ and noone ‘understands’
  12. Get the hell on with it

Now this is not a methodology I suggest for everyone. Only those driven by fear should attempt such a scheme.

As a ‘writer’ who has arrived late to the party, with no formal training, no degree in Creative Writing or the like, I worry I am not enough, that I am an imposter.  I am a storyteller not a writer. I do my best work on the fly, running with the creative threads that float around me, catching them and weaving them together. This is why my work needs a director, an editor, a God, a master, an editor.

I am merely the conduit through which the story comes alive, nothing more, nothing less.

Off to work lovers.

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One thought on “Cabin Crew, Crosscheck And Arm Doors”

  1. I have toyed with similar “methodologies” and find that with time I’m able to get from #1 (which is inevitable) to at least #7 pretty quickly. I tell myself that I’ve been here a thousand times before, things have always worked out, and all I really need to do start working and things will happen. As true as that is, it didn’t work right away. It’s taking time for my whole body and soul to believe it, but it’s definitely working for me. Good luck.

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