Yesterday I spent the day laughing and sobbing with equal abandon, at the funeral of a beloved friend to myself and many, many others. As we shared our favorite story of the man afterwards, I laughed so hard, I thought my face would break and shed even more tears. Who knew the body would create so many tears?
Isn’t that the best way to send off a friend? Life and death intertwined, funny and sad, good and bad. It all equals each other out in the end.
In the spirit of this, I learned a few things yesterday:
- Shared experiences means you bypass smalltalk. Straight into the guts of life and it’s mysteries, the best kind of connection.
- People’s grief is expressed differently. I ended up doing the ugly cry but I didn’t care and neither did the old friends.
- Time heals. What were those old feuds about from yesteryear? Nobody cares now. Least of all me. Life is too precious to hang on to the bullshit.
- Love transcends all. The love in the church, filled with 800 mourners, was intense but the love rose to the top, like cream.
- People find their own tribe. My clansmen were the mourners. Members of the ultimate troupe and we are all the better for knowing each other and him.
- Old friends are the funniest friends. Instant humour – just add memories.
- Understanding -Many of my tears were from finally realising what he had always seen in me and had taken 25 years to see in myself.
- Privilege – to have known him, to know each other and to have been a part of something amazing.