Deep Water


God, life can be tough sometimes, huh?

I could list my crappy existence but I won’t bore you, because everyone has things going on in their lives.

Life is messy. Life wasn’t mean to be easy. Life is a rocky road. They’re cliches because they’re true.

Right now I feel like everything and everyone is coming at me from all angles. Maybe this is only partly true, but it’s hard not to feel lost and alone.

My rock has come unstuck, and I feel like I’m drowning with nothing to hang onto right now. Nothing explains how I feel better than this poem by Stevie Smith.


Nobody heard him, the dead man,

But still he lay moaning:

I was much further out than you thought

And not waving but drowning.

Poor chap, he always loved larking

And now he’s dead

It must have been too cold for him his heart gave way,

They said.

Oh, no no no, it was too cold always

(Still the dead one lay moaning)

I was much too far out all my life

And not waving but drowning.


4 thoughts on “Deep Water”

  1. Waving ….and throwing you a virtual life jacket… over the seas… as far out as I can… I’ve got a mighty throw you know… and I’m doing the raindance equivalent for calm waters… and a gentle tide to bring you in….

  2. Hi Kate – sorry to read this post. Once again I applaude you because it’s honest but feeling like you are drowning without a flotation device is a scary experience. Our lovely mutual friend has sung your praises many times and from what I read here I see a very strong, bright & wonderful woman who juggles a career, family and that monkey on our backs (or the black dog if you like) so if you can see and use these qualities as your life jacket at the moment, it may help at least allow you to feel like the waters are calm enough for you to swim somewhere safe. XX

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