Life is complicated and hectic, with a devastating diagnosis causing seismic shifts in everything, and in everyone in my family.

My life is now dedicated to research, pushing doctors to take us in, arguing with gatekeepers of the wards, seeking second opinions and preparing for something that we are never really ready for, not matter how much we claim ‘we’re all dying anyway.’ We take on our roles in a crisis and mine is researcher and pushy bitch.

A dear friend, whose sofa I sat on for hours and cried after I learned the truth of the matter, told me that I am about to learn a lot about a horrible topic.

‘I don’t know how to do this,’ I cried to her.

‘Be the best version of you, you can be right up until the end.’

So that’s what I’m doing.

If I dip in and out of this blog, forgive me. Right now, I am working two jobs, trying to get a kid through her final year of school, trying to stay well and sane, and learning about the frailty of body and spirit, and the enormous power of love from friendship and family.

Thank you to those who know and have reached out. Thank you to everyone who reads this blog, or those who are left, and thank you for reading this, whoever you are.






15 thoughts on “”

  1. oh dear Kate – I hope this is not what it sounds like. Stay gentle with yourself – keep the good stuff for those you matter and don’t worry about us, the readers – we will stay faithful! Sending you warmest wishes and non confronting hugs (well hey strangers hugging is really bloody confronting!)

  2. Oh Kate, sending you warm thoughts, hope and strength. I’m glad there’s so much love and support of family and friends surrounding you right now. Pia x

  3. I don’t know. But it doesn’t matter and it’s frankly none of my business. But I can hear your panic and strength and hope you know that you have strangers (or in my case, one time face-to-face-meeters) as well as your friends and family who care.

  4. So much to say nothing to say ….sending love. Please find a few minutes every day to stop, centre and smell the roses, give your whirling mind a few minutes of respite xxx

  5. Oh Kate…this sucks. I will always be a faithful reader and will be here when you do drop in. Keep pushing lovely lady. Much love to you xx

  6. Hey Kate. I don’t know details, but I hear the gravity in your tone. Much love to you and your family in difficult times. We’re all ultimately fragile…it’s the human condition. But great reserves of strength we never knew we had can be found when someone we love is in trouble. I think you’re just the girl for the job. Remember to be kind to yourself. Tania xox

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